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Eat Cake For Breakfast | Or Donuts For Lunch

April 11, 2014


It's been a trying week friends.  Wells isn't feeling well and she's gone completely crazy.  She's 3.5 going on 13, I swear.  It's out of character for her usual sweet self.  She yells, she slams doors, she "quits our family", uses curse words (ooops, my bad.  I most definitely never drop the eff bomb), and overall refuses comfort.  Tagg, in return, gets super clingy which is actually hard to do for a Velcro baby.  I didn't realize we could actually be any closer without  him official climbing back into the womb.  My allergies are acting up and I'm hormonal.  Oh yeah, and we left yesterday for a week at the beach without my husband.  Can you sense the dread in my voice.

The truth is I'm just not looking forward to spending six days alone with them.  I know it will be fine once we get there.  And get on the beach.  And see old friends.  And drink lots of wine.  It's just hard vacationing as a single mom.  It's hard doing much of anything with a two year old and a three year old.

Can any of you relate?  Do you ever get away with just the kids and leave your husband behind at work?  I'm actually used to being a one-woman show most of the time so the missing few hours of co-parenting won't be that big of an adjustment.  And there is nothing a little salt water and sand can't fix.  And we're making memories.  So setting out on these adventures is always worth the extra work.

I don't want to leave this post full of negativity so I thought it would be fun to list 5 random things about myself.  A different twist on five for friday.

1. I always buy myself donuts when I bulk grocery shop.  I usually eat at least 2 or 3 on the ride home.  I buy allergy approved treats for the kids too so I can relish my treat in peace.

2.  I'm obsessed with Perrier slim cans and La Croix sparkling water.  I have at least one every afternoon.  I never drink soda so this is my vice. 

3.  I prefer to sit on porches and boats and look at the ocean over actually getting sandy.

4.  I still haven't bought a new coffee maker after our discussing a few weeks ago.  I have my mind made up but I just can't pull the trigger.  I'm this way with so many things.  I'm not indecisive just trigger-shy.

5.  I almost never go anywhere but pertinent errands, school, church, playdates, and playgrounds with my kids.  Always with a 2 hour limit.  Asking anything else of them or myself is just entirely too overwhelming.  I know our limits and I don't push them.  I don't really do anything of the things that a SAHM should do.  I know we're all happy for it.  I think our culture expects too much of mothers.

Okay, so how was that for an off-topic post.  I promise to get back to pretty shoes and lip gloss in no time. 


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20 comments:

  1. I hear you! I'm getting my wisdom teeth out today and my husband has to work. Thankfully my mother-in-law is coming to watch Sawyer today, but yikes! It is hard, but you'll do fabulously and have a blast at the beach!

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  2. Love the honesty, friend!!! Being a mom is tough, you will feel so much better in a year- 2.5 and 5 is lots easier! Have fun at PI.

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  3. Hope today is a new day and things get better! Thanks for sharing, things are similar at our house. I have a 3.5 yr old who will be going to school this fall and a 9 mth old. It is draining to attempt anything more that 2-3 shopping stops out with them. I would go out after my husband comes home, but by then and dinner its almost 8PM, so I too stick around the house for the most part. Enjoy your time in PI, take advantage of the extra help and get sometime to your self, it makes everyone happier I think. And to be honest, I prefer these type of blogs where we can all relate and support each other rather than list of things I cant afford. My things to save for list just keeps growing. : ) xo

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  4. I appreciate your truthfulness. Right now I have a 7-month old and I work full time, but my husband has just given me the green light to quit my job and be a SAHM. I am so torn as to what I should do and can't quite bring myself to give my resignation or pull my son out of daycare. Being a SAHM seems so much more challenging! What's your advice - keep working or bite the bullet and go for it? Thank you so much.

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    1. Kate, you need to do what will make you happy... what will make your heart happy. I have been a SAHM for 17 years (sounds like a long time when you say that out loud!). I have two boys 17 and 10. For me, I can not imagine my life any other way. It is like when you knew you found your true love and you could not imagine your life without him/her. When I was 20 years old I knew I was headed for a career, I had big dream and I was going to prove I was more than just a small town girl, and then at 23 God put a different plan in action. It wasn't too scary at the time because my husband and I were just starting out... we were far from established. So, financially we could make it work and we did. However, that is not to say that now at 40, it is not really intimidating to think about entering back into the work force. I am not sure "gets toilets super clean" works on a resume, but knowing that I don't regret being at home and not building my resume works for me. Just think about what will give you no regrets and your decision will be the right one. Good luck and have fun on your journey... whichever path you chose.

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  5. Girl, I can relate. Someone has stolen my sweet 2 year old and replaced her with a whiney, clingy, tantrum-prone hot-mess. Going anywhere these days is a major production. Try to have fun an relax at the beach. This "making memory" business is hard work. xxoo

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  6. Thank you for your honesty! I have a 1.5 year old and a1 month old with a husband who has to travel for work. And sometimes that calls for wine during nap time...

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  7. I appreciate your honest posts; it's refreshing from all of the perfection that blogging and social media seem to portray. As the wife of a police officer, I am often on my own as well for events & vacations and I feel your pain. Make the best of the week. The change of scenery will improve the kids outlook and clinginess as well. My 4YO is going through a nasty streak right now, so I totally get it. Let your anxiety roll away with the tide and take a deep breath (and sip your wine)!

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  8. I feel your pain. I have one day off a week with little A and it is SO hard and I feel guilty for wishing I had a little extra help that day. It is actually easier for me to go to work at this stage- our teeny apartment just doesn't give me enough space. Full discloser- being a SAHM was just too hard for me. Enjoy the beach!

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  9. Your honest, relatable posts are what keep me coming back to this blog each day!

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  10. I'm sitting here reading your post laughing (in a pity, I can totally relate sort of way) because I am on Spring "Break" (never a break when preschool isn't in session!!) without my husband for 2 weeks and it's been trying to say the very least. Just returned from a 1 hour stint at the pool where I almost had a heart attack because my 16 month old absolutely LOVED the water which I didn't quite expect and keeping up with him and m 3 year old nearly put me over the edge! We went to the zoo 2 days ago and it took me 24 hours to recuperate! Man can I relate, it's so stressful. #5 sums up my motto perfectly-we basically go to the park, preschool, playdates, and car errands as I call them-the kind where you can roll your window and accomplish your errand, and a max of 2 hours, any more and there is always a melt down and I'm yelling, last night's dinner "out" was a perfect example! Surely it can't be this hard for everyone, I always ask myself why I'm the only mom all frazzled and stressed when I look around?!

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  11. I've had a horribly trying 3-year-old week as well. I can't wait for everyone to start feeling better so we can get back to normal. Hang in there mamma!!

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  12. I'm sorry you are having a rough time with your kiddos! My just turned 4 year old has been quite trying the past year. I hope the beach is a lot of fun. I'm so impressed you took the kids by yourself. My husband usually works during my kids awake hours, so I get the weekly single parenting, but I think it's completely different when you are out of your element. The place you are staying looks amazing (from instagram). I love you five facts! Since becoming preggo and giving up wine/beer, I've picked up drinking sparkling water. It's my making dinner treat. And if I'm really fancy, I add lime. No sodas here either. And you have to get the new coffee maker!! Please tell me it's a Nespresso!!

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  13. SO thankful for your honesty. So many women try to pretend everything is perfect all the time. Being a Mom is not easy. I have three children, ages 10, 11 & 13. My husband has always traveled. I remember what it was like when they were 1, 2 &4...not easy. Good news!! It actually is gets better as they get older. Praying your week goes well at the beach!

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    1. You are so right Gayle, it does get better as they get older, but as I sit here with my oldest who is 17 and it taking the ACT today (hoping to get into Univ. of Chicago), I am sad and wondering where the time has gone. Even though those little yayhoos can be trying at times, enjoy every minute even the "I wish I could crawl in a hole and hide" moments because one day you will down and realize that what they say is true... times truly does fly. And, they will be ready to fly on their own.

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  14. I am a single mommy so I can totally relate and a proponent of salt and sand and wine healing most :) Headed to Tybee and Savannah this week and will be doing the same! Enjoy and I say get the kiddos in bed early instead of the other way around on vaca :)

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  15. I literally never comment on blogs I read or much of anything but reading your #5 really hit home. I completely agree with your two hour time limit and run my life the exact same way. The rest of that number also looks like a legit sentence I would type. We could be fast friends I can tell. Too bad I'm by Boston..regardless I enjoy your blog and Insta so thanks for the solace during our times of raising small kids!

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  16. I can totally relate. I get the yoy-yo between a dramatic teen and a cranky 4 year-old on a daily basis. Girls are so much harder than boys, in my opinion. Boys just break stuff and get dirty, no histrionics with them.

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  17. Your no 5...I know a woman who raised 8 kids. 8! She said she NEVER went anywhere with them unless it was critical/an emergency. She said unless it's bible study, don't worry about leaving your house with your kids. Yes, they should have an idea how to behave, but don't truck multiple little kids to the grocery store and think you won't lose it. That said, I'm a divorced mom, and it stinks. Stinks, stinks, stinks. I have other things to say about it but my grandmother ingrained in me a policy against all -uck words. (hee we used to say duck and truck around her just to get her to giggle.) Anyway, being a mom without support is hard, however long you have to do it for. Vacation with kids and no other adult appointed to help you is the pits. I go on them because I'd go crazy never to leave, but I don't relish vacations anymore. It's ok to gripe sometimes.

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  18. I'll say it like everyone else has...thanks for your honesty. I can totally relate to #5. Our culture has gotten a bit crazy. You might enjoy the books Simplicity Parenting and All Joy and No Fun. :)

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