Life + Style

May 5, 2016



Tagg has been having a crap time missing me lately.  I think it all started this past winter when he got pneumonia and struggled with his asthma.  He was out of school for about six weeks and for a child who is already 100% all about Mama this just confirmed his need to be with me 24-7.  And really, I'm okay with that for the most part.  I get that this stage won't last and one day I'll miss it.  I really do. But the thing is, he LOVES school.  LOVES IT.  We sent him a year earlier than we did with Wells because he was so eager and ready for some independence and peer playtime.

So this wasn't just about me needing some "me time" or wanting a break, although hello, yes I did; it was about watching him be too scared to do something he loved.  He wanted to want to go back.  He wanted me to sit in the hall way while he went in his classroom and played.  He didn't physically need me, he just needed to know I was there.  That I had his back.

We've been struggling with this separation anxiety for weeks now and nothing has been helping.  Until Monday, when we spotted the book, PENGUIN MISSES MOM.  The gist, Penguin is sad because Mom is leaving.  Penguin figures out that he can miss mom but still have fun.  Bam.  It clicked.  We've read it about a million times already and Tagg has been happily going back to school.  He literally flipped a switch.

It wasn't some big magic revelation or secret formula for fixing a problem.  It was as simple as a "yeah, me too" making him feel okay.  I know some of you will think this is probably digging a bit deep for a four year old and a board book.  But I thought about it and the connection to my blogging while I was driving home from Costco yesterday.  That the "yeah, me too" is why I've been sharing so much lately.  At the heart of it that's what is driving my need to write.  I want to share my stories so someone out there can find some peace in realizing it's not just them.  They're not alone.  We're not alone.

Of course by four o'clock I already second guessed this post.  It's kind of a stretch, right. So I decided I should turn it into a round up of bedtime stories and not even mention Tagg's recent struggle with being brave.  But then last night at Bible Study (we're doing the RESTLESS study guide) we talked about our spiritual gifts and what we can offer the world.  I had an inkling what mine were based on my interests but had never really thought about it in those terms before so I took an online test right there in the middle of our discussion.

My top gift: EXHORTATION.  I had to look that definition up, of course, but it means the gift of encouragement [insert wide eyed emoji]. It's like God was telling me I needed to share this story because there is someone out there this morning that needs to hear it.  And I need to keep sharing my stories not because they are important but because the sharing is..  Connection and stories build relationships and that's what it's all about.  Yeah, me too.

Of course y'all know that I love all this hippie dippie self-analyzing stuff.  I think it's all so interesting and ties in with what I'm working on with my life coach.  What is our purpose here?  What have we been created to do?  I'll talk more about my other four gifts and how you can learn what yours are soon.  Obviously the bible study is Christian based so it's got a Jesus spin but God is bigger than labels and I know that anyone with a belief in something bigger and greater than themselves can relate and get something out of these concepts.



  1. I get it....and yeah, me too!

  2. I feel like we are very similar. Have you ever heard of The Highly Sensitive Person? It sounds bad, but it really just means you feel things more deeply and respond more to everything..good or bad. 15% of the population is this way. A lot of creatives are. I think it can be hard i a society that values toughness and go-go-go, but it also comes with such strengths...such as exhortation. :)

    1. oh yes! I became very familiar with it last summer when I discovered that my daugther and my husband are both classic HSP. They are so intuitive and observant and it's absolutely a gift. I am very emotionally driven but don't get the benefit of all the great HSP gifts! :)

  3. I love this!! I'm sure that book will one day come in handy too. But I wanted to thank you for writing all you've shared about your anxieties with children with food allergies. My 1-year-old had a major allergic reaction to peanut butter a week ago and it was traumatizing and terrifying. It brought me comfort to know you've been there and you have an older (than 1) child and it will be okay, despite being harder. Appreciate you sharing your gifts!!

    1. Oh man, I'm so sorry. It is traumatizing. I basically suffered alone for a full year after his worst attack and I only wish I'd been more open quicker. I think it would have helped me so much not to just hold in and try to dismiss my fears. It does get easier though and second nature to accommodate!

  4. Your next read aloud with Tagg should be The Kissing Hand by Audrey Penn. it's a wonderful story that has a separation anxiety theme. We read it at our Kindergarten Orientation!


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